The Perfect wife                                         MONOLOGUE

Two armchairs, a glass coffee table and side table with a photograph are facing the audience. The feature wall behind is a neutral light brown with a Monet Poppies painting. Bright sunlight is creeping through the windows and reflecting on the furnishings in a streak like fashion.

An immaculately dressed woman in her mid fifties is sitting in one of the armchairs in her immaculate sitting room. She reaches into her handbag for her compact mirror and establishes her hair and lipstick are still in place.

“I am so glad Evelyn could eventually make it for coffee this morning. Her forever standing commitments with the Conservative Club and charity work had always somehow prevented her from popping round

The coffee is ready in the percolator; it only needs switching on and I  remembered the freshly baked biscuits I bought from the Health store yesterday. I admit it; it was a tad cheeky of me to cheat but I do rather like to say “I bake my own”.

Evelyn will be here soon; we said 11 o’clock.”

She glances at her watch and plumps up the cushion on the other armchair.

“I’m always  plumping cushions, much to everyone’s annoyance but then again a saggy cushion never looks neat; rather lived in I would say.”

She turns and looks at the back feature wall.

That paper on the wall. Cookie Dough I believe it was called. Looked good and very ‘in’

in 2011 but style has moved on this year to large florals in purples or turquoise. I will get my husband Dan to re-paper. Of course the Monet poppies painting will have to go. Far too busy for a patterned paper.”

She glances at her watch again.

“Its ten past eleven. Evelyn’s a bit late but then again she would phone if there were a problem.”

Her phone rings.

“James…….. I’m fine thank you darling. How are the family?......... That’s good. Glad you are all taking a holiday at last. Do you remember Evelyn, you met some years ago when we were at a charity fete? A lady of  fine standing? She has finally found some time to pop around for morning coffee. No of course I’m not panicing; everything is in place as always. Remember? Must go; I can hear a car. Speak later. Bye darling”

                                                  

She puts the phone back on the glass coffee table.

“Oh look at that smear on the glass. It sticks out like smoke from a dirty industrial chimney. I’ll wipe it with this tissue. That’s better.

She glances at her watch again.

“It’s eleven twenty, I hope Evelyn  can still make it  umm. I hear she is a stickler for punctuality umm”

The photo on the side table catches her gaze.

“We’ve always had good standards and high expectations. You know, immaculately run home akin to almost military precision. I had a career and was the only parent to pick her boys up from school in my suit armed with a briefcase when the child minder couldn’t. The other mothers at the school gate were rather ‘clicky’.  I was a career woman so I suppose my life was a different one. They would chat very briefly so  I  invited a couple of  them round for coffee (one at a time). We would chat and I do believe they were impressed by the immaculate  standards I maintained. I  enlightened them on how I successfully juggled the household by everyone obeying only to the strictest of  rules at all times. Yes, by “clockwork I’d say: it was the only way to manage. They seemed grateful for the ‘tips’.

 Dan invited a work colleague and his wife in for drinks one evening. The wife said she wasn’t aware we had children and enquired if they were out with friends. I informed her they were tucked up in bed upstairs. Always 7.30 on the dot and then not a sound. She also said she was impressed and again I proudly gave her a ‘run down’ on how disciplined I needed everyone to be so the home could be run  with precision. I could’nt deal with mess or that awful ‘lived in’ look. It was a pleasant evening though and I did ask Dan to invite them again but as he said, “they were a busy couple”

We had a “blip” when Dan had a heart attack at the early age of 42. It was “touch and go” and as usual with such things he was advised to have as little stress as possible.

The two boys were encouraged to excel at school. James was always drawn to IT and that he did. I was delighted when he took his Masters; it would stand him in even better stead.

The perfect son I would say. Mathew on the other hand was a nervy, unsure child so I considered he should follow Dan into airline engineering. It would get him “through the door” and might aspire him into a career as a Flight Engineer or even Pilot training. Dan did manage to get him in except for the fact that Mathew went missing and couldn’t be found for months. A ‘missing person!!’. Why did the lad do that with a good apprentiship ahead of him? Anyway he was eventually found living with some new friends he had met and was working as a Sales Rep or rather Sales Executive as they call themselves. Yes, of course                                                                

he had the upbringing; good manners, smart appearance and good line ofspeech whilst selling his product. Perhaps he would learn the ‘tools of his trade’ and become Director of his own Company one day.”

(She glanced at her watch again)

                                                                    

Umm, 11.30. Where is Evelyn?”

The phone rings.

“Oh hello Evelyn I was getting worried………….Oh you can’t make it………..Yes of course you must get your washing machine fixed if the Engineer is only your way today. Let me know when you are free and we’ll do coffee another time.”

She puts her phone into her handbag and takes out her car keys.

“Might be an idea to go out and look for that wallpaper.”

She gets up out of the chair and walks towards the door

Close curtains

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